#2

I am not talking.
I am not whispering or pretending.
I just really want to keep quiet, because it is easier. 
It always starts with the Need; the Urge to say, to speak and to scream about what there is inside.
But every time it gets uncomfortable. It makes me feel frustrated with myself that I allowed my self to speak. It makes me feel that one word forces me to speak a whole book out loud and I really hate it. I don't want it.
So what should I do? When I want to say something, but I want it to be short, to do not keep me tight, keep me imprisoned.
I want it to be a whisper, a soft touch of a feather, to be as invisible as the air and strong enough to be heard.
Have you heard me? Yet hidden behind anxiety and trust issues; i am waiting. Right here, where you do not know me. But use your imagination. I am very small. Almost invisible. Very quiet. So you need to be focused, you have to believe that I am existing for real. Because I am here and I am screaming.

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